It's been quite some time since i last typed in my online diary. Now it's time to revive it.

There's so much to say, but i do not know where to even start. So much that happened, and this makes me scared to see what's ahead in the future.

But most of all, i need someone, no matter a guy or a girl that can be there for me, be there by my side. Not a lover but a true friend that i can really really trust.

There's just so much kept inside that at times, i feel like exploding, break down and just leave.

Honestly, i have no one to turn to for any matter, yes, you may laugh out loud at me, i dare to admit.

I may have many friends around me, but i can't seem to find the right one to share my deep thoughts and feelings with. I'm afraid to be judged and criticized of. Plus i do not want to make him/her judge others too after hearing me out.

Sighs.

At times, i just need a shoulder to lean on, some one to tell me it's gonna be okay, and see that ugly face of mine when i tear. Sadly, there is none.

I guess i'll just have to continue keep everything inside that little heart of mine. Sometimes, it's just better to be just deaf and dumb.

Life just ain't easy living.

eLaiNe signing off heart broken.