so many things are changing.

when can it stop?

as we grow older, things are becoming more serious.

no more playing around, fooling around.

its all about responsibilities.

i wanna just stop the time, cause it hurts.

i don't like how things are now, and it is getting worst.

i hate.

eLaiNe signing out hoping time will stop.

"I'm so disappointed in you."

"You're such a disappointment."

thats all i can hear.

but when can i hear this, "I'm so proud of you."

never.

eLaiNe signing off as a failure in life.

i had a nightmare. a very fearful one.

its still in my head. those flashbacks are crucial. they are haunting me.

those words that appeared are going nowhere but to remain in my head.

it makes me feel like avoiding so badly. i no longer feel secure.

whenever i think about it, my eyes will start to tear.

now i know there is no fairytale. its all a lie.

i fell hard this time. i no longer believe in the word 'trust' for i'll be betrayed.

did you know, when you're close to someone;you're hurting someone close too?

no use acting innocent, the world is cruel.

everything can be deceiving.

now i am living in fear. the last and first thing before and after i wake up will be filled with this fucked up thought wish i never had knew about.

i think i'm slowly turning mad in some way. perhaps white hairs will be my evident?

its killing me.

i hate feeling this way.

i just wanna wake up from this dream so badly.

it hurts.

eLaiNe signing off depressed. =(